Here are some answers to prayer and more things for which to pray:
–The bleeding from Matt’s incision has subsided. This is wonderful.
–The drain which they placed in his brain during the surgery looks like it has done its job and they are planning to remove it tomorrow; a good step towards leaving the ICU.
We are so thankful for these things!
–With the removal of the drain, the concern is that he will begin bleeding again so they will be transfusing him the whole time
–We are trying with all our might to obtain the targeted therapy medicine that will, Lord willing, shrink and help us manage Matt’s cancer, including the cancer in his brain. However, the red tape surrounding that has been an obstacle and so we wait and might have to wait through the weekend. This is not so much a matter of patience, but trusting the Lord as the tumors in his brain continue to grow unchecked with the possibility of bleeding again with each day.
–Recently, it has been brought to my attention that there are additional hurdles as it seems the radiation treatment which Matt needs and the rehabilitation services that he will also need are in conflict with each other and where Matt’s best possible care could be ruled out because of financial politics. Thus, tomorrow I will be doing my best to advocate for my husband and best friend with pretty much anyone who will listen–from my insurance company to the hospital social worker to the rehab facility to the radiation oncologist.
–The biggest physical challenges Matt faces today and for which I know he would dearly love prayer are his thirst and his restlessness. Matt has not had a proper drink of water for seven days. He’s getting plenty of IV fluids so his body is hydrated, but his swallowing muscles were impaired by the stroke and he is presently unable to drink water. He is thirsty. In addition, because he is unable to move the limbs on the left side of his body, the limbs on the right rove and search restlessly all day long. It’s a bit like somewhat involuntary flailing. It is stressful and exhausting for Matt and nearly non-stop.
We speak of obstacles and hurdles and challenges and those are appropriate words because all of this feels very much like a race or a trial through which we need to persevere and overcome. We have need of things like endurance and patience for the ever-changing landscape of what is set before us each day and for those things we look to Jesus.
Today, in the midst of the flailing and the thirst, Matt looked at me and said, “This is exactly what the Lord wants for us.” And, look, it is not easy and sometimes life isn’t because we live in a broken world where instead of running to God with nothing in our hands but surrender and pleas of mercy, we adamantly insist on clinging to the broken shards of our own good works or our pithy arguments with God. In only one of those scenarios is there life and life abundantly. A long time ago, Matt and I agreed with God that our lives and our deaths belonged to Him, that He alone was our treasure. In His hands, if you have eyes to see it, are life and kindness and mercy and love purchased at the cost of His Son in the midst of a world starving for such things. And so it is that we both say that today is the day that the Lord has made, struggles and all, and we will rejoice and be glad in Him.